"In my end is my beginning"-T.S. Elliot

I wanted to start this entry with a quote. A quote that sums up my crazy year here at Michigan State University. I picked this one because I know that the end of this year has brought a new time in my life. This year was far from ideal, not my typical idea of an awesome college experience. I had a lot of changes that I was going through, some issues that I needed to deal with before I was happy. This year was different. All my friends were doing there own thing and had their own battles to fight. Feeling that loneliness was one of the triggers. For the first time since I had started college I felt alone, more so than when I knew hardly anyone and had no friends as a scared little Freshman. I was not ready, or prepared, to deal with this. Everyone in my life could tell I wasn't myself, I knew I was not myself. It was hard for me to see myself and know I couldn't do anything to help me. I tried to be happy, but that isn't so easy for anyone who has tried it. Happiness comes from somewhere deep inside and even though you tell yourself you want to be happy, it doesn't always work. I thank God everyday that Jason was here for me. If I didn't have him, I would have been lost. He made me want to be myself again. he knew I was different but not as different as my friends had noticed. I think this is why he was nicer about it, that and the fact that he loved me. :) It was frustrating seeing myself, I can imagine how it seemed on the outside.

This year was a hard one for me. Thank-fully I got some help from my lurvely gyno. Lol. I am able to laugh, and hang out, and do the stuff I always had fun doing. It feels awesome on so many levels. So this is why the ending to this year is the beginning of something better for me. I just want to say thanks to everyone that stuck around, and I am glad I stuck around for others too. I think this year was crazy for everyone, and I am really looking forward to next year. I hope it will be my year finally. We will see. Until next time fellow bloggers! xoxo